Wednesday 27 March 2013

How and Where To Find Men For Sex


(For more comprehensive detail read my book THE VERSATILE HUSBAND in paperback or e-book download at Amazon.com ) 



Men who want sex with men can find willing and enthusiastic partners in a variety of places. Sometimes these are anonymous contacts, sometimes they are planned. Local gay newspapers and gay directories of your city are generally available online, so use them to know what’s happening re parties, safety issues about cruising areas, telephone numbers for bathhouses, etc.  Here’s a few ideas to get you started....


Internet: There are a myriad of dating sites on the Internet, and because you’re reading this on the Internet I presume that you already know your way around. Choose the one that suits your sexual interests the best. For example:

Men of all ages:  Gay.com, Gaydar, AdultFriendFinder, OutPersonals, GayCupid, ManPlay, GCruise, Cruising For Sex

Mature males and their younger admirers:  Silver Daddies, Apollo Network, Gay Mature Dating

Bears (men with hair and their admirers): Bears411, Bearfront, Daddy Woof, Bearwww

Instant Cruising: Grindr (Phone App), Squirt. Growlr (Phone App)

Bathhouse / Sauna: Most cities have a sex-on-premises male bathhouse (or sauna) where bi and gay men meet for the purpose of sex. It can be friendly or anonymous and there’s always guys there willing to share sex. The facilities usually have a spa, steam room, shower, lockers, cafe, gay papers, private cubicles, public play areas and opportunities to voyeur on others having sex. They are safe, government approved places for sex. You’ll find a lot of married men at them especially during the day and late afternoon.


Jack Off (Wank) Clubs: Groups of men who like masturbating with one another. Generally no oral or anal sex, total nudity, everyone in the same room and lots of touching, kissing, pleasuring with oils or lubricants, conversation, masturbating one another in groups and a happy feeling of being in a community of like-minded men. Great for men not interested in the full gay scene nor interested in anal sex.  Check the locations link at: http://www.nyjacks.com/index.php/links

Cruising Outdoor Locations: Beaches, forests, secluded lakeside areas, suburban parks, roadside rest stops  – they are all places men use to meet one another for instant, often anonymous sex. Such places are not legal for sex, can be dangerous but are never-the-less vital sexual outlets for married, bisexual and gay men of all ages.  Use them at your discretion and with care.

Sex Shops and Adult Bookstores: Cruise the backrooms for sex with like-minded men in a safe environment. Group and individual masturbation, glory holes for oral sex, cubicles for privacy, television porn, generally remain fully clothed, no showers available.

Gay Bars: Through the local gay press you’ll find gay bars that generally operate for particular gay types (hairy bears, young twinks, drag performances, leather etc). Mostly operate at night. Many hold special events such as foam parties, underwear parties, fund-raising drag nights, best butt, Mr Gay etc. Sex is usually off-premises though the parties are anything goes.

Pay For A Man: Yes, put up your money and you can choose the best possible man for an hour or so of sheer indulgent pleasure, doing exactly what you want him to do to you. Why put up with the average when you can have the best – and when you’ve totally satisfied yourself, show him the door. No awkward moments, no need to reveal any details about yourself, and you can choose a horny man who in other circumstances mightn’t even look at you.

Adult Cinemas: These show sex videos (both gay and straight) whilst patrons indulge in self masturbation, group masturbation, straight sex or gay sex. Sex is very voyeuristic. (see my blog article Adult Sex Cinemas for more details).

Sex Parties: Check the local gay press especially for holiday weekend parties. There’s always several advertised both at gay bars as well as other venues. These can be sex parties or dance parties (sometimes with a backroom for sex). Bathhouses sometimes have nude nights.

Massage: Indulge yourself for a massage with a gay masseur and you might get to have a ‘happy ending’ as he masturbates you to a sticky climax. You’ll need to negotiate beforehand if he does such extras. If he doesn’t, then enjoy the massage and shoot a load when you get home. 

Like-Minded Social Groups: Meet guys who share the same interests, hobbies or culture you do. Check the gay press for community listings where you’ll find gay clubs for auto enthusiasts, walking and hiking, specific ethnic or cultural groups, movies, dining out, nudity etc. These are good for meeting men that can lead to sex at a later time and different locations.

When you’re horny and keen to get a man for hot sex don’t forget the safety aspects; the physical circumstances of the encounter, the sexual safety re using condoms and mental impairment that can happen through drug use. We’re all ruled by our sex urge at these moments but if we can apply a little common sense then playing safe in every respect will let us have great ongoing sex without any issues of fear, sexually transmitted diseases or guilt. 

Have the best sexual fun you can possibly have!  Enjoy!

 (For more comprehensive detail read my book THE VERSATILE HUSBAND in paperback or e-book download at Amazon.com or paperback only from booksellers across the internet including The Book Depository or Barnes and Noble or your local bookshop)

Wednesday 13 March 2013

Your Underwear Defines Your Sexual Confidence


(taken from THE VERSATILE HUSBAND by Peter Benn - Page 94) 
Paperback and e-book at Amazon
or Paperback only online at Barnes and Noble, The Book Depository or other online booksellers.


Underwear – such a simple word, yet a word filled with emotion and latent sexual expectation.  At their simplest, underpants cover a man’s genitals and buttocks.  They add comfort, support, warmth – they’re very practical.  And that is generally the approach taken when a wife shops for her husband.

But they are much more than that. They are symbols of how a man feels about himself and his masculinity.  They should make him feel good, feel sexually masculine and empower him with confidence.

Does your wife buy your underwear?  Is it underwear that your father or grandfather might have worn? Is it the cheapest, safest, whitest, and most conservative underwear on the market?  Are all pairs the same? Do they glaringly say that here is a man who is not in control of his life – especially his masculine and sexual image of himself?  If your answer is “yes” to any of these, then it’s time for a makeover.

Interesting, stylish, feel-good jocks are an important statement about yourself. There’s a bewildering range of styles, cuts, shapes, materials and colors available, so there’s no excuse in not being able to find ones that make you feel good, feel sexy, and/or make you aware of your sex organs throughout the day.  The latter reminds a man that he has sexual energy trapped in his groin that is growing stronger and will need satisfying some time soon. A constant reminder that your horniness is increasing is a feeling of being alive to your masculinity.

And buy lots of different pairs, styles and colors so that as your mood is defined at the time of dressing you can choose a style or color that fits your expectations for the day. As a man becomes more sexual, so his interest in equating stylish, exciting, even erotic underwear grows apace.  If a guy feels good ‘down there’ then his whole attitude to life changes to a more confident one.

And remember – if you’re having gay sex in a gay world, then your underwear can immediately tell your partner a lot about you – and you don’t want to project an image of a conservative wife being in charge of your masculinity. Underwear helps to define a sexual man, so begin enjoying the sensual benefits and enormous variety that this industry gives us.